I can no longer call this my secret diary, as Samantha forgot to pack it for me, and has been reading it. Still, now I'm back from my triumph over Europe, at least I can carry on writing in it. She said it was "jolly nice", which is dashed decent of her.
My speech in this video says all that needs to be said, and I cleverly prevented any "reporters" from asking their clever trick questions by leaving, and making them look as if they couldn't keep up with my superior intellect!
Britain continues to be made to look Great by me! It is true that none of the leaders I spoke with, some of them for more than a minute, seemed to understand what I was saying, but that will not stop me making a brilliant success of my clever plan.
EU migrants must be prevented from claiming in-work benefits for four years, the same way that we are making sure our own people will have to stand on their own two feet, by removing the foolish safety net of "benefits".
Clearly, we must be fair to everyone. Those with no feet will be proud to stand alongside us in this!
I told the little reporter people, “It has been a long night and we have discussed some very important subjects, but above all I am delighted that the process of British reform and renegotiation and the referendum that we are going to hold – that process is now properly under way … we have started that process.”
Lots of people seem to think I can't get the whole process of reform of the entire Lisbon Agreement done by 2017, when we will have our in out in out in out in out in out referendum. They say it can't be done in time.
Even that common Farage fellow doesn't seem to understand my determination to continue to do impossible things. Champagne time, more later!